Big relationship mistakes

Ineffective communication

Being able to communicate effectively helps remove interference's a relationship can face. Ineffective communication leaves the door open for assumptions. When this happens, it makes it difficult to understand each other. You believe what you want instead of listening. It makes it harder to have a difficult dialogue. A Lack of vulnerability and not being open/ close-minded to new experiences contributes to trust issues. Without trust why are you still in the relationship?

Inconsistent Love

One of the biggest misfortunes that can occur in a relationship is inconsistency. Being able to maintain an honest relationship with your partner through hardships, misunderstandings, and distractions is essential in the success of the union. A major part of being a consistent partner is honesty. Words and actions must match. Enjoying each other’s company, reliability, awareness, loyalty, honesty, and most of all commitment, all link together to create a foundation that can only be broken by being inconsistent. Focus on what made you attracted to that person’s energy and gradually build off that. Consistency is the key to opening doors to a life long partnership and forever love. In other words step your game up.

Lack of affection

A lack of affection can be triggered by various complications. Infidelity, dishonesty, health issues, children, family, and finances can put a strain on relationships. If the issues are not addressed and fixed distance is created. An individual can lose the passion they once had for the relationship. The individual begins to shut down and not express feelings. The romance is gone as well as the sex and spontaneity. When the love, affection, and willingness to work things out are gone, the relationship is useless. Infidelity by any means does not justify a lack of attention. If you find yourself contemplating being unfaithful maybe you should be single.

Outside influences

In a relationship, you and your partner should always be the best of friends. When you accept a commitment, you are required to put in the work in getting to know your partner inside and out, flaws and all. Keep people out of your business. For example; taking bad advice, oversharing, and comparing your relationship to others.

When you begin to overshare all the details of your relationship, especially that bad details, you leave room for everyone to put their 2 cents in. Not all advice is bad, but you should be able to have enough faith in your union to know when someone else is trying to manipulate your thought process to ruin your relationship. Don’t get me wrong this is not always the case, someone can have good intentions, but the advice is just bad or does not apply to your situation.

Overstepping boundaries / being controlling

Respect in a relationship is extremely important. When you have mutual respect for your partner, there are certain boundaries you will not cross. Overstepping boundaries and not respecting your partner can make them feel less than. Making decisions especially important decisions without your partner is highly disrespectful and passive. The move shows that you do not care for your partner's input nor their feelings. By doing this, you have shifted the dynamic of the relationship. It can be interpreted as a power move to become more controlling. It is deceptive. Using deception to control your partner is a form of abuse. The “it’s my way or the highway” mentality is a form of discipline and does not have a place in any relationship.

Abusive behavior

Abusive behaviors are a clear-cut sign that you need to leave a relationship. Abusive behaviors in a relationship are; drug/alcohol abuse, manipulation, narcissism, physical/mental abuse, bad financial choices, and bad lifestyle choices. These behaviors are serious threats to an individual’s security, not just the relationship. When you decide to abuse your partner mentally or physically, that is a sign of insecurity. You lack the self-control it takes to conduct yourself in a relationship. You are not confident and capable to be in a relationship.

Manipulation and narcissistic behaviors have been proven to be deadly in relationships. Narcissists are typically men who need constant approval to feed their egos. They feel a sense of entitlement. They disregard their partner's feelings. Their rage is usually triggered by drugs, alcohol, or past trauma. The men also manipulate women into being helpless without them, making it hard for some women to leave the abuse. Unfortunately, many women are not able to leave these situations. Many narcissists usually end up fatally harming their partner resulting in the death of the partner or both individuals.

Bad lifestyle and financial choices can be an abusive factor in a relationship too. If you are in a relationship with someone who is repeatedly making bad decisions that negatively affect you, it can take a toll on you. Whatever your partner does affects you. For example, if your partner is constantly getting arrested, you then must be the one to help facilitate, the lawyer, bail money, take time off work, etc. Your partner's lifestyle choices are also a reflection of you. it is not worth it to stay if the behavior is not corrected immediately. You must put yourself first.

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